TV Commercials of the 70's and 80's

Here are some listings of my seventies and eighties commercial compilations culled from the thousands in my collection. I'm always open to trades (VHS and DVD). Please email me (pgsaur at frontier.com) if you are interested in anything here!

Saturday, April 03, 2010

So, uh, Why Exactly?

I know that's what you're wondering. Most people skip through the commercials, or flip around channels to avoid them. Commercials suck. They're annoying, banal, stupid. Especially, you may argue, the ones that are the focus of my collection: the mostly-forgotten celluloid snippets of shameless crap-peddling that have been scraped from that cringingly-recalled epoch, the 1970's.

This is all accurate, or, as the young people say, true dat. Yet I love them. I dust them off and catalog them. I study them. I watch them repeatedly, with fascination and affection. Except the ones I can't fucking stand, such as any spot with singing children. (Maybe that Oscar Mayer kid gets a pass, but that's it.)

I'd estimate that I have between three and four thousand commercials in my collection, mainly seventies through about 1986 (with some 50's and 60's in there, and even some early 90's--not my nostalgia spot, but interesting and fun to watch nonetheless). [10/11/12 add: Lots more now...]

Commercials are designed to sell, and therefore appeal. They make fascinating time caplets which reveal not only how an era was marketed to, but how that marketing was done in its time, with technical effects and styles of storytelling clearly evolving.

Actually, speaking of evolution, it's funny--there seems to be quite a bit of zaniness on display in the older black-and-white ads of my collection, with inventive special effects and playful narratives. In the seventies, however, I find there's something of a step back, with much less absurdity and more trite, insipid ads. This evinces either a lack of respect for the viewer or a lack of inspiration on the production end. I'd guess it was typically a smidge of the former and an assload of the latter.

I have recently been working on several different theme tapes, despite the fact that I can't sell them on eBay anymore because I don't own the copyrights on these ads. Of course, no one owns the rights on these old commercials (maybe the biggies like Coca-Cola or McDonald's retain them forever, I don't know), but anyway that's eBay's policy. I still make collections from time to time because they don't take all that long to assemble and it's fun to notice odd little details that I never caught before.

I made a music-themed tape for my buddy Mike whom I've known since the fifth grade. I included any ads with musicians, plus ads that featured familiar jingles or were highlighted by music. There were tons of disco-influenced ads back in the day, so I included what I have. You haven't lived until you've seen the Duncan Yo-Yo "Disco Duncan" ad. Okay, you've lived, but not well.

Making this tape, I rediscovered a hilarious spot (from around '79 I'd guess, give or take a year) for GWG corduroy pants. It was probably the fifteenth time I'd seen it, but I suddenly realized there's a moment where... well, I'll describe the whole ad for you.

Scene: A very cheap-looking, overly-lit disco set, with glittering ball overhead and about two-dozen twenty-somethings placidly grooving and shuffling on platforms of various heights. It seems there may not have been any music actually playing as they filmed, but we viewers are treated to a generic dance riff with a female singer intoning "Movin' on a dream! Ooh, ooh, ooh! Movin' on a dream!"

A chubby, combed-over fella with tinted shades and lapels rivalling an albatross' wingspan (think a melding of Sam Kinison and Paul Williams) sidles up to a young couple and says, in an afternoon drive-time DJ voice: "Movin' on a dream, gettin' down at the disco! Hey man, how do you get down so well?"

Blond guy (think Christopher Atkins around the time he realized he wasn't getting the Blue Lagoon sequel): "These GWG Cords really let you do it!"

The guy's partner, a thin-faced, mushroom-haired girl (picture Shelley Duvall portraying Toni Tennille) says something about the satisfactory fit of her pants, and we are then treated to several close shots of snugly-waled heinies gyrating.

The detail I had never noticed before comes as the guy's butt is prominently displayed in the foreground of the shot. If you look just past him (to his front), the girl's arm can be seen with her wrist at about his belt level, and her dance moves make it look like... well, like she's doing something for him that is not typically done on a dance floor (unless maybe some ecstasy tabs, dimmer lighting and a bigger crowd is involved). Like she's awfully, shall we say, handy. Upon first noting this, I thought that I simply had a dirty mind. Then I showed it to my friend Jim, who laughed so hard that I briefly wondered about the nearest defibrillator.

Did they do it intentionally? Hard to say. Given the level of competence of the rest of the production, probably not. Too much thinking involved in planting subliminal images. Although they did throw in another odd detail: when the tag line is chyroned onto the screen at the end, the sentences appear upward; that is, the first line pops up, then the second line appears above it instead of below.(Why do I even notice these things?) It would seem a deliberate decision was made to do it that way. So maybe some thought, however facile, was actually put into constructing this after all. Or maybe everyone was just really stoned.
[1/29/12 add: Thanks to my new DVD drive, you can see it here yourself! Okay, so I exaggerated about certain details--but I think I caught the essence pretty accurately. The helping hand occurs around :21.]



It isn't a subliminal message that strangely pops up on the screen during a spot for Michigan's Buscemi's Pizza--it's an absolutely blatant act of sabotage (though one probably unpremeditated, for what that's worth).

As fifteen non-actor kids (a mere 5 of whom wear Buscemi's t-shirts) cavort on a playground, singing (ugh) of their love for said pizza with varying degrees of enthusiasm and skill, a woman newscaster is suddenly superimposed across the lower right side of the screen.

She is deeply invested in picking her teeth, dreamily digging between molars with a fingernail.
We watch her for a few moments until, it appears, an off-set monitor catches her eye.
Just as it seems she's realizing that she is watching herself unflatteringly broadcast live over the ad, poof she disappears. Presumably the heads of some cheeky director and cameraman consequently rolled. Now, I don't know who that anchorwoman is, but I would surmise that, for such a gleefully ill-conceived conspiracy to occur, she probably deserved it. People obviously hate her.

Oh, about those themed collections I mentioned... I concocted a sports tape of ads with athletes, and another one I call "Strange Figgers... Weird Figgers" (after a Groucho line). It features ads with people wearing stupid costumes, bizarre puppets, and creepy stop-motion characters. Characters such as "Li'l Softie," a tiny naked cherub-woman with a large blue hat topping her oversized head, hawking Nice n' Soft bathroom tissue. Li'l Softie has kinda like a regular woman's head, but with a pudgy Kewpie doll body, and it is almost certainly brain-damaged. It yammers on in a breathy voice about toilet paper while standing on a supermarket aisle endcap. The imagining of its everyday existence is bleak and heartbreaking.

Gruff character actor Ron Masak (he's that guy who impersonated Lou Costello, and played the sheriff on Murder She Wrote) plays his role of a regular fella out shopping with his wife with a distinctly Klugmanesque air. He encounters this Softie creature and regards it with a mixture of wariness and disgust. When it squeaks that Nice n' Soft is "softier" than other bathroom tissues, Masak repeats the made-up word with exaggerated incredulity. Soon he realizes the TP is indeed superior to other brands, and although he will only concede that the paper is "very, very soft," his demeanor turns to reluctant acceptance, his new warmth undoubtedly laced with pity for such a grotesque abomination of God's law as Li'l Softie.

For the Strange Figgers compilation, I avoided traditionally animated commercials, as that could make up a tape on its own. I did, however, include Milton the Toaster (I just find it funny to see a little girl talking to a toaster which will later have a cartoon face superimposed on it) and a Pac-Man Bread spot with the cheapest effects ever--I swear the Pac-Man looks like it's made of yellow construction paper. I haven't tested this tape out on friends yet, but I predict it would inspire lots of laughs, even without "enhancement" of any sort. (Oh, I'd recommend it, you understand, but let's call it optional.)

Drop me a line if you have anything I might be interested in for trade, or if you're looking for something in particular. If a commercial for the Hugo, Man of a Thousand Faces puppet exists and you have it, call 911 and tell them you must speak to me immediately.

Friday, April 02, 2010

LOCAL NEW YORK CITY COMMERCIALS of the 70's and 80's!

Here’s a tape for anyone who grew up in the New York City area in the 70’s and 80’s. It’s two hours of NYC area local commercials of that era. It would make a great, utterly unique Christmas gift, if you know anyone from Long Island, Queens, Brooklyn, Manhattan, Staten Island, the Bronx, or much of Connecticut or New Jersey.

This tape features dozens of long-forgotten, low-budget gems, the kind you once enjoyed--or endured--during late-night horror movies or afternoon cartoons. Some of these commercials can be found on my other tapes, but most are unique to this tape. If you fondly recall how bad some local commercials were, there are some doozies on here! There are also lots of commercials with scenes of the majestic World Trade Center twin towers, including one touting the observation deck. Having grown up on Long Island, I can tell you that watching these can be bittersweet. You may want to take that into consideration if planning to give the tape as a gift… Drop me a line if you have something to trade, or whatever...

Video quality and audio quality vary throughout the tape, but I try to ensure that my collections are highly watchable, not like the many headache-inducing tapes I’ve encountered in my years of collecting. If there’s a crummy-looking ad here and there, it’s because I feel the nostalgia value justifies its inclusion. Check it out...
 

7/18/13 note: I'm currently finishing up the extensive planning for a "Sign-on to sign-off" compilation, incorporating these local NYC ads and segments plus many others I have acquired since I created this comp. It will play in order, from a WPIX sign-on to cartoon openings, syndicated show promos, local station movie opens, evening news segments, terrible late night ads and finally a WNEW news headline voice-over and star-spangled sign-off. (Of course, there's an annoying Emergency Broadcast System break in there too.) I'm just getting started on the actual assembling of the pieces, from the best quality source material I have, so check back in a few months...

WNEW-AM- Ted Brown telling a lame joke.

WOR 4 O’clock Movie bumper - "Strategic Air Command will return."

Commander Oil - Remember the trucks with the German Shepherds on top? This ad's a little garbled, but worth it.

Two Guys

Dial Santa - Peter Billingsley.

Korvette’s

WKTU

Playworld

WABC 4:30 movie bumper

Childworld

Sasson – NY Rangers Phil Esposito, Ron DuGuay (?) and two others, skating around like a bunch of chooches.

Ritz Thrift Shop (partial) - "You don't need a million to look like a million." "Oh, thank you..."

WPLJ - (1978)

WABC-AM - (1978)

Magic Garden LP - Paula and Carole hawking a record, plus the poster and markers.

Cross at the Green PSA

Macy’s Thanksgiving

WNEW NJ Newsbreak card

WNEW Lucy card

WNEW Big Apple Minute – Bill Boggs, City Island (1980)

JFK Express - "Take the train to the plane." (1980)

Drucker’s - "Shop me last!"

Crazy Eddie - (1981)

WKHK

WNEW Merv card

WNEW 10 O’clock News card

Crazy Eddie

Brooklyn Botanic Garden - Most boring commercial ever--they don't even show any gardens!

WOR Bowling For Dollars outro

WNEW Woody Woodpecker card

WPIX Mighty Mouse outro, card

WNEW Little Rascals card

Lotto - (1982)

Ringling Bros., Madison Square Garden

Alexander’s

Great Adventure Roaring Rapids (Joe Namath)

WPIX movie - That’s Entertainment (partial)

Crazy Eddie

WPIX Movie card

WNEW News card

Mays Bankruptcy

WNEW Movie card

Colonial Yankee Franks (George Steinbrenner)

WPIX-FM

WCBS Christmas (Ed Koch, Michele Marsh, Peter Allen, PM Magazine hosts)

WCBS News

WNEW MASH card

WNEW All in the Family card

Robert Fiance School - Rocky rip-off

TSS

Woolworth-Woolco Xmas

Willoughby’s

11 Alive

Mays Xmas

WOR Kiner’s Korner (1980)

US Auto Schools

WPIX card

Nevele

1010 WINS

Shop-Rite 1983

WNEW Woody & Bugs card

WNEW Battle of the Planets (partial)

Sneaker Corner

Korvette’s

WCBS Stanley Siegel card

Jack LaLanne

Bank of Ireland - REALLY bad.

Radio City Music Hall – "Napoleon" movie

WOR Bowling For Dollars

New York Air

Dry Dock Savings Bank

Spinal Cord PSA – Yankee Dave Revering

WNEW Hogan’s Heroes card

WCBS News Brief promo

Two Guys

A&S

Herman’s Warehouse

Korvette’s Xmas

Mays Xmas

Mays Xmas Toys

WNBC Live at 5

Alexander’s Xmas

Mount Airy Lodge - Winter: "Have a fine winter time in the Poconos, with your host with the most in the Poconos, Beautiful Mount Airy Lodge!"

NY State School Bus PSA

WPIX Krofft Superstars card

Globe Shoes - Kotter-looking guy busts a shoe-oriented iambic pentameter.

WPIX Old Timer’s Game card 1983

Impact on Hunger Day - 1983, Met Ed Lynch and Met wife Sandy Swann (who's rather hot, natch).

NY Dairy Council Milk PSA

WYNY

WNEW Flintstones card

Control Data Institute

Robbins Menswear - Nice Jewish boy avers, "My grandfather gave you discounts, my father gave you discounts, someday I'll give you discounts!" (1977)

World Trade Center

Haunted Mansion in Long Branch - The scary original that ran forever.

Astroland - Coney Island

John McKean for Assemblyman

Meadowlands (John Gambling)

St. John’s College

Newmark & Lewis

Annie - Animated ad for the Broadway musical.

Two Guys

WPIX break cards - Including "PIXXX pal Felix Unger." You'd call in and play an Intellivision game on the screen, yelling "Pix! Pix! Pix!" when you wanted the spaceship to fire (or whatever the game was).

WNEW promo

Carabine (WTC)

Sasson (Vince Farragamo)

WNBC Chuck Scarborough

Toy’s R Us (WTC)

WNEW Carol Burnett card

Bob Gigante for Senator

Hudson River Day Line

Lenny’s Clam Bar

WNEW Movie card

Toy’s R Us

Fugazy

Mays

Big Apple Minute – Bill Boggs, Little Italy 1980

Big Apple Minute – Doris McMillon, Lower East Side 1980

WCBS Jim Jensen

News 4 card

Downstairs Up Record Shop

Dial-a-Story

TCI

Daily News Super Zingo

WNBC Live at 5

Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat

Brooklyn Special Olympics

KISS-FM

News 4 promo

Koch for Carter

Fae-Mart

Carvel – Little Miss Half-Pint Beauty Pageant .

WNEW Midday promo

Great Bear

Big Apple Minute – Gil De LaMadrid, Staten Island Ferry 1980 (WTC)

WOR Editorial (partial)

WINS-AM (WTC)

TSS Xmas

Playworld

Martin Paint

Carter NY Primary

Kaufman Carpet

11 Alive

WAPP

WABC-AM (Yogi Berra)

QP’s and Ceaser’s Bay Bazaar

San Michel, Verducci Leather - Early rap and breakdancing. Must be seen to be believed.

11 Alive

Dairy PSA

Avenue I Flea Market

Sam Goody

WABC

Record World TSS

Record World TSS

Sports Cards

WOR - Briefly, a young Sara Lee Kessler.

WABC

WOR-AM John Gambling & Gene Klavan

WPIX Movie promo

WOR

Mount Airy Lodge - Spring: "Have a fling in the spring in the Poconos, at your host with the most in the Poconos. Beautiful Mount Airy Lodge!"

Wild West City - Regrettably, not the one with Uncle Floyd Vivino, but the one with the old-timer asking, "Where's Wild West City at?"

New Jersey’s Got It

WABC 4:30 Movie promo

Rockaway’s Playland

Music Line

WCBS News cards

Two Guys Xmas

WOR Movie

Albert Merrill School - Jimmy Randolph escorts young women new to the big city to the AMS.

WYNY

WNEW Woody card

Prejudice PSA - "Jimmy's my Jewish friend!"

Big Apple Circus

Bike Safety PSA - Opens with kid taken away on stretcher. Officer asks kid's father if he ever taught the kid the rules of the road. "I thought he had a little common sense!" splutters the unconcerned pop. Officer chastises dad slowly for a very long minute.

Integration PSA

New York Daily News - Reagan shot, 1981.

Gloria Marshall

NYC Summer Jobs 1981

KISS-FM

WHT

Steve’s Pier 1 - In Bayville. I'm sure Jackie the Jokeman Martling got thrown out of here many a time.

Little Shop of Horrors

Koch for Governor

Lotto

Clean Up NY PSA (Danny Aiello)

Clam Broth House

Anti-Graffiti PSA - Irene Cara, Gene Anthony Ray, Mike Newlin, Hector Ramos.

Circle Line (WTC)

WHN

WNEW Woody card

WPIX-FM (Peter Allen)

Lotto

WPIX bumper

Dana Lincoln-Mercury

Carvel – Fudgie the Whale!

WCBS News

WNBC promo

Blackstone the Musical

Genovese Xmas (William B. Williams)

WNEW Scott Muni

WPIX News

Potamkin

Crazy Eddie

Brick Church

Western Beef & Farmer’s Market

WAPP

Male Shop

WNEW Popeye card

Keep NY Wet (Don Imus)

WYNY

Keep NY Wet - Noo Yawk kids implore you to "save woughta!"

Gimbel’s - Lori Loughlin.

Teddy’s - Tribeca restaurant.

WDHA

Bronx Zoo - Paul Simon heard singing "At the Zoo."

WNBC Jane Hanson

Foodtown

Haunted Mansion and Amusement Pier

Cadillac Furs

WCBS 101

WNBC News

WNEW Mission: Impossible card

Action Park

WCBS News

Rainbow Shops

WKHK - Deborah Shelton.

Hotel Seville

WOR Movie

Marriott’s Essex House

Coronet - Yes, it's those two tuxedoed, mustachioed brothers of the bad read and stiff walk. And no talking orangutans.

Collingwood Hotel

WNEW-FM Calendar

Dial-a-Joke

WNEW Abbott & Costello card

WOR Xmas

Charles & Lillian Brown’s Hotel - Featuring, I kid you not, the Jerry Lewis disco.

Ernie Anastos

Lenny’s Clam Bar

Castro Convertibles - Bernadette Castro, all growns up.

Golden Nugget Casino

WHTZ Z-100 (WTC)

SAFE Car Dealer - Brooklyn's own, with New York Cosmo Giorgio Chinaglia.

WPIX Star Trek card

Kingsburg Amusement Park

Uncle Floyd WBTB channel 68 promo

Milleridge Inn - This joint's been open since, like, 1648 or something.

MAACO

Dime Saving Bank (partial) - "The road to riches starts with the Dime."

Two Guys

Dreyfus

Queens City Savings

Plaza Olds

Flemington Furs

Record World TSS

Korvette’s

Playworld

Fortunoff

Honda of Mineola

Norwalk Factory Outlet

WRFM - Shields & Yarnell do their Clinkers shtick.

Bally’s - Joey Bishop and the infamous Roy Radin introduce some really lame Vaudeville acts.

WOR All Night bumper

New York City EXTRA!

I made this compilation as an accompaniment to the "NYC Local" collection. On that one, I tried to include as many different local ads as possible, whereas this one has many more of the familiar stores and channel ID's (some not listed here for a little extra surprise here and there).

I also included a number of national and regional spots just because I remembered them so well from my Long Island childhood that I figured others would find them memorable too. There's also quite a few Christmas commercials that I omitted from the NYC collection because I had already put them on my "Christmas & Toys" compilation. Unfortunately, there are some repeats from the "NYC Local" collection--an oversight on my part--but only a few.



Jet Net - Some junky outdoors toy, the kind with metal hinges that pinched the crap out of the web between your thumb and forefinger, usually leaving a blood blister. Fun!

Pathmark - James Karen

Mays - Summer

Fun Fountain - By Wham-O! This one always made me laugh cuz the last kid running through the fountain gets clocked by the plastic clown hat.

Korvettes - Memorial Day sale

WHN - Freddie Fender.

Good Morning New York bump, WABC

Heartbeat LP

Pulsar watches - Really racy for a commercial which aired during afternoon cartoons. ("It's the time of desire! Pulsar! Pulsar!")

Pure Gold LP, K-Tel (slight announcer flub at end)

Slinky '77 - Groovy orange shag carpet.

Star Wars Early Bird kit '77 (mailed in early '78)

Korvettes - Election Day

Mike Douglas WCBS card (Elton John in NYC)

Koch for Mayor, partial

Korvettes - car care sale

Burger King - in person, Sayreville NJ, 6/10/78

WABC Musicradio, brief

Two Guys - white sale

Look of Love LP

Two Guys - Dollar Days

Nemark & Lewis - That guy.

Mays - "Pre-Washington's Birthday sale"

Crazy Foam - robot cans ("Foam-a-tron")

Crazy Eddie - electronics

Dumb Ditties K-Tel LP - animated (Morton Meatball)

Korvette's - music sale

Music Magic K-Tel Lp

Mays - Spring menswear. Polyester vested suits, $49.99. Sweet.

Power Play LP, K-Tel ("In tune with the 80's")

Chams du Baron - The Chams man, who seems like a real turd. But discolicious!

Bonjour - A&S (to tune of Frere Jacques)

Goldiggers jeans by Jetset. Really pushing the jeans craze on the kiddies.

Crazy Eddie - Christmas in August

Ferrari Jeans - Cafeteria disco!

Crazy Eddie 84 - computers

Musicland - New Wave! Stupid!

Woolworth & Woolco - AFX race sets

Sergio Valente - Roller disco! (With, I think, Stephen Shortridge, lesser Sweathog.)

Pathmark - 30th anniversary sale, 3/28/81

Ohrbach's - Strawberry Shortcake shop ("for girls," they add needlessly). Says on-screen announcer, "There is exciting big values [sic] coming your way."

Tale Lord Jeans '81

Full Tilt LP, K-Tel (Strange, brief scene of Darth Vader watching Debbie Harry)

Spiderman Fluff Flyer - According to VO, "almost everyone" will love it. Were they worried about a lawsuit?

Superhero Power Shields by Funstuff

Burger King Star Wars glasses, Jayne Modean, until 2/2/1978

Pathmark - James Karen, 3/15/81

Mays - 9th store in Scarsdale (shortly before dropping back to four stores), shows old footage of founder Joe Weinstein

(Coupla cool quickies in here)

McDonald's sports mugs

Two Guys - Preschool toys

Luv-It clothes, Dana Plato, 1980 ("I used to dress like a real dog...")

RIF (Reading is Fundamental) PSA, Ed Asner

Crazy Eddie - Richie Rich in-store appearance, NJ, 10/22/83

Mays - Election Day (down to four stores)

Dancing Madness LP, K-Tel (Weird VO sounds like a cross between Otto Mann and Bababooey.)

Two Guys - Back to school

McDonald's grand opening, 1972. This actually aired in the Detroit area, but I recall this national spot so well (and the old blue uniforms) that I included it.

Dunkin' Donuts, Mason Reese for Munchkins. Odd boy.

Super Puff basketball. Mom pretends to play, but is really only blocking the furniture. She knows it's just foam rubber, but she can't help herself.

Burger King, Knicks tickets offer thru 12/30/78

Korvette's - Food processors and hair dryers

ABC Sunday Movie open

Shop Rite - 2/10/79

Willoughby camera, Manhattan. Really bad actor.

Carvel, Valentine's Day, Cupie the Chocolate Nut. Tom chuckles.

Great Adventure

Lung Association

WPLJ ("Caring about you and the music.")

Woolworth Woolco, Halloween (Six Million Dollar Man, Bionic Woman, Holly Hobbie)

Wallach's

Music Machine LP, K-Tel, Robby the Robot gets down.

Solid Gold LP

Crazy Eddie - Christmas

WHT (Superman, 10)

WCBS radio promo, brief

Kids R Us

Childworld

Two Guys - Race sets, Lionel trains

Mays - Christmas

WNEW card

Mays - Back to school girls

Woolworth Woolco - Albums

Ice Capades, Dorothy Hamill (MSG, Nassau Coliseum)

Crazy Eddie '83 - Stereos ("...the all-new compact disc system.")

Macy's '83 - After Christmas clearance

WCBS-FM

I Love NY Lottery - Estelle Harris (George Costanza's mom)

Mays - Father's Day

WPIX "We'll return..."

Toys R Us - Halloween (Yoda, Big Bird costumes), animation, '80

Macy's & Bambergers - Billy the Kid boys' fashions. Scott "Flick" Schwartz shops (with a guy I hope is his father) and gets way too enthusiastic about it.

Crazy Eddie Christmas

Two Guys - More preschool toys

WNEW card

Shrinky Dinks, Puffi-Fuzzi

WNEW cards

Ceaser's Bay Bazaar, Christmas

Romper Room, WOR

Bonjour - Macy's (eerie shot of WTC in background, small plane flies toward it)

Playworld - one with little kid "singing" baritone at end

Jack LaLanne - So very 70's.

Childworld

WPIX card

Coca-Cola - Christmas ("I'd like to buy the world a home, furnish it with love...")

10 jeans

MTV ("You'll never look at music the same way again.")

Tropicana, Atlantic City

Ferrari Jeans (Couple lays down, their denimed asses creating a vast horizon. You'll see.)

Rockbottom

Activision hockey, Phil Hartman

WNEW cards

Crazy Eddie '81 - clearance

Beefsteak Charlie - "Feast for One" (with creepy, cartoon-voiced nephew character)

The Admiralty, Mammoth Beach, NJ

Stride Rite, Strawberry Shortcake, Harry's Shoes in Manhattan ('81?)

Crazy Eddie '81 - Telephones

Crazy Eddie '81 - video

Mays - Mother's Day

WNEW card

Caldor - Christmas sale

Crazy Eddie '83 - microwaves ("Chicken not included.")

Crazy Eddie '83 - Christmas

Crazy Eddie'83 - Steve Miller LP, Abracadabra video

Fussy Customer Stores, NJ, animated

Joujou jeans

White Castle '80 - Serendipity Singers (check out the bad lip synching of the last line!)

Zena jeans - Boating fun with a trio of small-chested ladies. Must've been the thing at the time.

Beefsteak Charlie - Free shrimp!

Crazy Eddie '82? - Christmas

New York Telephone

Jordache - Macy's, amusement park, Radio City Christmas show offer

Sands, Atlantic City (This woman looks just like Lana Clarkson, but I can't say for sure...)

Crazy Eddie '80

WCBS news, Jim Jensen, Rubik's Cube story

Toys R Us - Christmas '76, animated

Toys R Us - Arte Johnson

Woolworth & Woolco - Christmas

Penn Estates, NJ

Better Business Bureau PSA, Abominable Snowman puppet

Kahn's Meats - animated

Phone Guard (Some NY radio announcer for a phone tap warning system!)

Weekly Reader books, Sweet Pickles '77, with animation

Chardon jeans - Larry Bird in an arcade

Penn Hills, Poconos ("For lovers only...")

Toys R Us - Superheroes in person, '80

Emerson ("Mamasan! Papasan! Emerson!")

Wildcats by Buster Brown

McDonald's - Winter Magic

The Bowery - Joe DiMaggio

Life cereal - Mikey!

Energy PSA (Earth's fuel gauge hits empty: "What then?")

Greenfield Village and Henry Ford Museum ("Time was...")

FDNY PSA, stay out of empty buildings

White Plains Galleria - Christmas

Duncan Yo-yos - Disco Duncan, one of my favorites.

Korvette's - Fall and Winter sale (read: going out of business sale)

International gourmet pan

Zimm Zamm ("Kazoo not included.")

WPIX movie card

Medic-Alert bracelets, Dana Plato

Magic Show kit, Marshall Brodein (you know, Wizzo the Wizard).

NBC stars (such as Jon-Erik Hexum and Meeno Peluce) wish you "Merry Christmas." Includes WNBC's Jack Cafferty and Sue Simmons.

Jay & the Americans Greatest Hits (with Jay Black in his electric blue satin outfit, yeesh)

Zena jeans - Bo Derek lookalike

Shrinky Dinks - Glow in the Dark

Chock Full o' Nuts coffee - Page Morton Black and Pinocchio

Koch for governor

Flemington Cut Glass - NJ, Founder's Sale

National Kidney Foundation, Gary Coleman

Lite Beer by Miller, Billy Martin

United Way - Staten Island Meals on Wheels, Wesley Walker

Reflections LP, K-Tel

Emotions LP, K-Tel

Freezy Freakies gloves at A&S

Jordache at Macy's

RIF, Carol Burnett

Lite Beer from Miller - Bowling tournament with Rodney Dangerfield, Billy Martin, Bubba Smith, Dick Butkis, John Madden, Ben Davidson, Boog Powell, Steve Mizerak, et al...

Greater NY Blood Program PSA

ABC nutrition PSA - Timer makes "Wagon Wheels!"

Lite Beer, Billy Martin and George Steinbrenner ("You're hired.")

Money Store, Phil Rizzuto

Crazy Eddie '84 - Video

Fortunoff, Lauren Bacall

McDonald's - Winter Fun

WOR news, Jennifer Valoppi, '88

WOR, Rolland Smith, '88

Avenue I Flea Market

Harrow's - Election Day Christmas sale, '88

PM Magazine - Uncle Floyd segment, '82 I think

Amityville Horror '79

Let's Disco instructional LP, K-Tel

United to Broadway show tours - actual casts of A Chorus Line, The Wiz, Annie, Dracula (Frank Langella)

Magic Cow, Dairy Association - Add drink mix to milk and then add a scoop of ice cream. I blame Magic Cow for kick-starting the obesity epidemic.

WOR 9 All Night open

Bamboo Steamer - Great for when you want all your food to taste the same.

TV Guide - Valerie Bertinelli cover, 3/5/83

Manhattan Special coffee soda - Al Passaro, Mr. Personality.

Apex Tech - That guy.

Jamaica tourism- ("Make it Jamaica, again.")

United to Broadway - casts of Cats, Dreamgirls, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, plus the Rockettes and Brooke Shields

WOR Million Dollar Movie

Carvel - Cookie Puss! (His real name is Celestial Person, BTW.)

WOR News Digest with Denise Richardson

WPIX FM - Air Supply, Will Vinton claymation

WKHK

WHT - Star Wars

Ultra Brite toothpaste - A really dumb early 80's effort to close it out.