SUPER COMMERCIALS of the SEVENTIES!
With this tape I've tried to capture the feel of that sensational decade, the 70's. (I suspect a few early 80's ads have slipped in here and there, but decades always bleed over a little, don't they?) Some have once-familiar faces, jingles or slogans; some aren't well-known or are downright obscure but were too discolicious to ignore. I've tried to note as many celebs present as possible, in parentheses. (NOTE: I have changed this recently, so I'm in the process of making sure this list is accurate...)
SSP Smash-up Derby
Kenner Screen-a-Show
Slip ’n Slide, Water Wiggle
Gnip Gnop
Big Josh - Not Big Jim... the other guy. He liked to camp it up, too.
Twirly Birds
Shaker Maker Hairy Bunch
GI Joe
Pop Fly
Frosty Sno-man Snow Cones
Battleship - "You sunk my battleship!"
Play Doh Fun Factory
Play Doh 4 Pack
Miller Lite - Pool tricks with Steve Mizerack.
Pepsi - Everyone loved Frisbee in the 70's!
Levi’s Panatela - Remember the stitching? (Charles Kimbrough)
Jeep Cherokee (Dee Wallace)
ABC Eight is Enough, Vegas (Kim Catrall)
Good Morning America 1979 (David Hartman)
Bell Systems
ABC
Pepsi - Another 70's pastime--frog-jumping contests. Okay, not so much.
ABC World News Tonight - Peter Jennings, Frank Reynolds, Max Robinson. 1979
Lowenbrau - Here's to good friends, tonight is kinda special / The beer you pour must mean something more somehow / So tonight, tonight / Let it be Lowenbrau. 1978
AMF
Goodyear
ABC Happy Days, Laverne & Shirley, Three’s Company, Taxi
Aviance - It's gonna be an Aviance night...
ABC Welcome Back Kotter, What’s Happening 1977
ABC
WFFA Dallas newsbreak - Iola Johnson, 1977
“Star Wars” - The original TV ad (in fact the copyright appears to say 1976) 1977
Love’s Baby Soft - You can try hard / You can try soft / Soft'll make him toe the line...
Mrs. Goodcookie
ABC Lucan, The Macahans 1977
ABC Starsky & Hutch, Love Boat 1977 (Kristy MacNichol)
General Motors
CBS 60 Minutes, All in the Family, Alice, Lucy Goes to Nashville 1978
ILGWU (International Ladies' Garment Workers Union) - Look for the union label / When you are buying a coat, dress or blouse...
Bell Phones
CBS movie “The Bible”
CBS
CBS Newsbreak - Marlene Sanders, 11/17/78 - Neutron bomb
Contac - Weird music, little capsules bouncing all over.
Chevrolet - '79 Chevette
Consumer info - Pueblo, Colorado. (Michael Vale)
Revlon - Cream-on blush (indeed!)
Whirlpool - Dramatic Leslie Nielsen VO.
McDonald’s - Two apparently drunken imbeciles try to say "There's more in the middle of an Egg McMuffin than an egg in the middle of a muffin." Although this can barely be considered a tongue twister, they can't do it.
CBS Flying High 1978
Ford Mercury
“The Wiz” trailer 1978
FTD Florists - That gold guy.
Fruit of the Loom - The original characters and Emma.
Bell Phones - Uses the song Feelings to really tug at your heartstrings.
No Nonsense pantyhose
Twice as Fresh
Colony Wine - Rick Marshall from Land of the Lost (Spencer Milligan?) suggests that one should drink wine for the taste because that's how you'll know if you like it.
“Manhattan” 1979
Anacin
Silkience Shampoo - Scanner photograpy. That's not greasy kid stuff!
Chicago White Sox - Na na na na, hey hey...
Clairol Herbal Essence - Cartoon hippie chick pollutes stream with shampoo.
ABC "Still the One" promo
Tickle deodorant - Giggling gals just love that roll-on.
Zenith VCR
ABC All-Star Family Feud, “Death of Ocean View Park”
M&M’s - Candy Man theme with weird guy in yellow overalls.
ABC Captain & Tennille card
Enquirer
People Magazine July 1978
ABC News
ABC "We’re the One" promo
Good Morning America - Has twenty uninterrupted seconds of the old theme.
ABC Bionic Woman, Baretta 1976
Hold Cough Drops
Saturday Night Live with Howard Cosell card- The original SNL.
ABC 1976 Convention coverage, Harry Reasoner
ABC Charlie’s Angels premiere promo, 1976
Duncan Yo-yo - Disco Duncan! Must be seen to be believed.
WCBS-FM
Perdue - Frank Perdue himself.
Schaefer - Sittin' pretty, all together in Schaefer city. Two schmoes are trapped in an elevator with Swedish stewardesses, pretzels and cheap beer. Only in the 70's...
Control Data Institute
Ken Crane’s - It seems like these cheap Star Wars-inspired graphics were once featured in every third commercial...
Polavision - Precursor of modern VCRs.
Star Phone 10000
Schick Hot Top - That red ball you stuck on top of a shaving cream can to warm your lather. You can still find them at yard sales.
Totes (Kelly Harmon)
Penguin Point
Monster cereals - I believe you even see Fruit Brute in there...
Pop Shoppe
McDonald’s - Introduction of the Happy Meal.
Sanyo - Discolicious!
L-K Restaurant - AYCE perch!
Astroland - Coney Island! Ride the Cyclone! POP--Pay One Price!
Mays - Polyester!
Picway Shoes -Back-to-school!
Coca-Cola - Bobby Riggs and Billie Jean King lookalikes battle it out over Pong in the arcade.
Treetots
Charmin - Mr. Whipple, natch.
St. John’s College - Ah, campus life in the 70's. Groovy.
Woolworth & Woolco
ABC Bod Squad: Quickfast - A glass of milk, toast with a slice of cheese and out the door to school you go. Is mom on a bender again?
Annie - The Broadway show.
Stick-ups - It may be a good place for a Stick-up, but why is that guy in a closet?
Richway
Magnavision
Jiffy Pop - Before everyone had a microwave, it was this crap or buy a popper.
WPIX cards
Day Line cruise
American Furniture Warehouse 1978
Sunkist soda - Good Vibrations!
Pizza Planet
Clearasil - With Wolfman Jack--none other, little brother!
Jack La Lanne
Alka Seltzer - Plop plop fizz fizz. (Sammy Davis Jr.)
ABC Sunday Movie opening
Burger King
WLS & Disney
New York Air
Sprite Light
Organ Power Pizza - Discolicious, with folks line-dancing to The Hustle played on a big pipe organ.
Pepsi - Intro of 2 liter bottles--refillable! It's a rip of Welcome Back Kotter with Paul Kreppel (It's a Living's oily lounge singer) as the teacher.
Jordache Wild West
“Pick-Up Summer” movie trailer - It makes you want to head to a drive-in immediately!
Lung Association
Minolta (Doug Henning)
Maybelline - Discoliciousity!
Kodak (Michael Landon)
McDonald’s - "Friends" 45 single benefits, I think, Muscular Dystrophy. With MD poster child Rocky Arizzi.
Woolworth Halloween - Six Million Dollar Man, Bionic Woman, Holly Hobbie costumes.
GWG Cords - Super-discolicious! "Hey man, how do you get down so well?" "These GWG cords really let you do it!"
K-Tel Music Machine - Robby the Robot gets down!
Aviance - Yet another Aviance night.
Playtown
Steve’s Pier 1 - A restaurant with that great dark-wooded 70's ambiance.
Clam Broth House
Circle Line - With the World Trade Center in the hazy background.
Oscar Mayer - My bologna has a first name...
Band-Aids - I am stuck on Band-Aids...
Budweiser - Featuring the Taste Buds, that nutty tribute to the wonderful combination of pot and beer. How did they get away with this?
WKTU - Discoliciousness!
9 Lives - Morris the cat.
Tabu
Jack Lalanne
WPLJ 1978
Texas Instruments - Digital watches the size of your head. 1978
Simon
YMCA (John Havlicek)
Kraco car stereo
Tab
ABC News - "The Seventies: American Dream, American Nightmare." 1979
CBS Newsbreak 1979
Preparation H
RC Cola - Me and my RC...
Kentucky Fried Chicken - The Colonel himself makes an appearance. 1978
Apple Jacks - A is for apples, J is for jacks, cinnamon toasty Apple Jacks...
Rice Krispies
Star Kist - Charlie the tuna.
Maidenform Bra
Swanson TV Dinners
ABC 1976 Olympics
ABC Wide World of Sports
ABC Hardy Boys promo
Pepto Bismol - Indi... (urp) ...gestion.
ABC All My Children promo - Has the classic soap opera move: Woman (Susan Lucci) goes to strike man, he grabs her arm, pulls her in for long, sloppy, passionate kiss. It looked ridiculous then too.
Agree - Stops the greasies!
ABC Wide World of Sports - 2nd version.
White Castle - The Serendipity Singers, whoever the the hell they are. 1979
Hostess - I think a bit of the beginning is cut off, but I couldn't resist adding this for Captain Cupcake and Fruit Pie the Magician.
Better Business Bureau - An Abominable Snowman puppet advises you to spend your money wisely.
Sweet Pickles Books - Courtesy of Weekly Reader Books, animals with personality disorders teach kids how not to behave.
$100,000 Bar - Chewy, chewy "carmel" (to the tune, more or less, of Sugar Sugar). 1979
Pop Rocks - The cracklin's what's happenin', the sizzle makes you giggle... (Ricky Paull Goldin)
Underoos
Wisk - You've got ring around the collar, you poor chump.
Clairol Herbal Essence Shampoo - You're gonna swear you've got more hair.
Calgon - Take me away!
Garanimals
Memorex (Ella Fitzgerald)
Popeil Pocket Fisherman - Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach him to fish, he'll eat for a lifetime. Sell him a glove compartment-sized rod for twenty bucks, he'll fish for an hour until it breaks.
Bain De Soleil - For the St. Tropez tan.
Sonic Drive-In 1977
Life Cereal - Even that pug-nosed snob Mikey likes it.
Energy PSA - The one with urgent music, showing planet Earth with a gas gauge heading for empty. It's scary as hell, and it was RIGHT!
Henry Ford Museum and Greenfield Village - Time was, people made their own candles, hooked their own rugs, and, apparently, went to Dearborn Michigan on vacation so they could make their own candles and hook their own rugs.
Eastern & Disney 1978
Contour Girdles
K-Tel Pure Gold LP - Announcer misses cue at end.
Pop Tarts - Milton the Toaster.
Record World - Shaun Cassidy LP's.
Look of Love LP
Hawaiian Punch - Punchy, that obnoxious, violent creep.
Burger King - Star Wars glasses, 1978
McDonald’s - The stock grand opening ad, showing the old blue uniforms. 1972
Star Trek Command Communication Console 1976
ABC Brady Bunch - Mid-seventies promo.
ABC Sixth Sense - Creepy promo for short-lived Gary Collins series.
ABC Monday Night Football - Jazzy!
Energized Spiderman figure
Hardy Boys dolls
Honda Scooter
Tootsie Pop - Mr. Turtle and Wise Old Owl offer no help whatsoever in ascertaining the number of licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop. Modern science will later determine the answer as 411.
CBS In The News intro- Okay, it's one from the eighties, but it has the same voiceover guy and that great computery theme which effectively announced, "Okay, cartoons are over--get your ass off the floor, put your cereal bowl in the sink and go outside and get some fresh air fer crying out loud!"
ABC Time For Timer “You are what you eat”
ABC Schoolhouse Rock intro and outro
Keep America Beautiful PSA 1971
Humane Society PSA
Forest Service PSA
Korvette’s
Burger King
WOR Bowling for Dollars promo - NYC, Larry Kenney
Dairy PSA
Buscemi’s Pizza - All-time classic from Detroit... Dumb ad, but suddenly you see a local anchorwoman superimposed over the screen, picking her teeth! No doubt it was some director doing it as a goof, but then the anchorwoman looks to the side, presumably at a monitor, and the image disappears! I bet heads rolled for that one...
Ritz Thrift Shop - Played in NYC forever.
Cross at the Green PSA
Empty Buildings PSA
Downstairs Up Record Shop
ABC Partridge Family - Jeez, Danny Bonaduce was never funny.
Burger King
Chams Du Baron
Albert Merrill School
WPIX
Trix - Trix rabbit does his Fonzie impression.
Burger King (Patrick Swayze)
McDonald’s
ABC Time For Timer “Wagon Wheels” - I hanker fer a hunka cheese!
SSP Smash-up Derby
Kenner Screen-a-Show
Slip ’n Slide, Water Wiggle
Gnip Gnop
Big Josh - Not Big Jim... the other guy. He liked to camp it up, too.
Twirly Birds
Shaker Maker Hairy Bunch
GI Joe
Pop Fly
Frosty Sno-man Snow Cones
Battleship - "You sunk my battleship!"
Play Doh Fun Factory
Play Doh 4 Pack
Miller Lite - Pool tricks with Steve Mizerack.
Pepsi - Everyone loved Frisbee in the 70's!
Levi’s Panatela - Remember the stitching? (Charles Kimbrough)
Jeep Cherokee (Dee Wallace)
ABC Eight is Enough, Vegas (Kim Catrall)
Good Morning America 1979 (David Hartman)
Bell Systems
ABC
Pepsi - Another 70's pastime--frog-jumping contests. Okay, not so much.
ABC World News Tonight - Peter Jennings, Frank Reynolds, Max Robinson. 1979
Lowenbrau - Here's to good friends, tonight is kinda special / The beer you pour must mean something more somehow / So tonight, tonight / Let it be Lowenbrau. 1978
AMF
Goodyear
ABC Happy Days, Laverne & Shirley, Three’s Company, Taxi
Aviance - It's gonna be an Aviance night...
ABC Welcome Back Kotter, What’s Happening 1977
ABC
WFFA Dallas newsbreak - Iola Johnson, 1977
“Star Wars” - The original TV ad (in fact the copyright appears to say 1976) 1977
Love’s Baby Soft - You can try hard / You can try soft / Soft'll make him toe the line...
Mrs. Goodcookie
ABC Lucan, The Macahans 1977
ABC Starsky & Hutch, Love Boat 1977 (Kristy MacNichol)
General Motors
CBS 60 Minutes, All in the Family, Alice, Lucy Goes to Nashville 1978
ILGWU (International Ladies' Garment Workers Union) - Look for the union label / When you are buying a coat, dress or blouse...
Bell Phones
CBS movie “The Bible”
CBS
CBS Newsbreak - Marlene Sanders, 11/17/78 - Neutron bomb
Contac - Weird music, little capsules bouncing all over.
Chevrolet - '79 Chevette
Consumer info - Pueblo, Colorado. (Michael Vale)
Revlon - Cream-on blush (indeed!)
Whirlpool - Dramatic Leslie Nielsen VO.
McDonald’s - Two apparently drunken imbeciles try to say "There's more in the middle of an Egg McMuffin than an egg in the middle of a muffin." Although this can barely be considered a tongue twister, they can't do it.
CBS Flying High 1978
Ford Mercury
“The Wiz” trailer 1978
FTD Florists - That gold guy.
Fruit of the Loom - The original characters and Emma.
Bell Phones - Uses the song Feelings to really tug at your heartstrings.
No Nonsense pantyhose
Twice as Fresh
Colony Wine - Rick Marshall from Land of the Lost (Spencer Milligan?) suggests that one should drink wine for the taste because that's how you'll know if you like it.
“Manhattan” 1979
Anacin
Silkience Shampoo - Scanner photograpy. That's not greasy kid stuff!
Chicago White Sox - Na na na na, hey hey...
Clairol Herbal Essence - Cartoon hippie chick pollutes stream with shampoo.
ABC "Still the One" promo
Tickle deodorant - Giggling gals just love that roll-on.
Zenith VCR
ABC All-Star Family Feud, “Death of Ocean View Park”
M&M’s - Candy Man theme with weird guy in yellow overalls.
ABC Captain & Tennille card
Enquirer
People Magazine July 1978
ABC News
ABC "We’re the One" promo
Good Morning America - Has twenty uninterrupted seconds of the old theme.
ABC Bionic Woman, Baretta 1976
Hold Cough Drops
Saturday Night Live with Howard Cosell card- The original SNL.
ABC 1976 Convention coverage, Harry Reasoner
ABC Charlie’s Angels premiere promo, 1976
Duncan Yo-yo - Disco Duncan! Must be seen to be believed.
WCBS-FM
Perdue - Frank Perdue himself.
Schaefer - Sittin' pretty, all together in Schaefer city. Two schmoes are trapped in an elevator with Swedish stewardesses, pretzels and cheap beer. Only in the 70's...
Control Data Institute
Ken Crane’s - It seems like these cheap Star Wars-inspired graphics were once featured in every third commercial...
Polavision - Precursor of modern VCRs.
Star Phone 10000
Schick Hot Top - That red ball you stuck on top of a shaving cream can to warm your lather. You can still find them at yard sales.
Totes (Kelly Harmon)
Penguin Point
Monster cereals - I believe you even see Fruit Brute in there...
Pop Shoppe
McDonald’s - Introduction of the Happy Meal.
Sanyo - Discolicious!
L-K Restaurant - AYCE perch!
Astroland - Coney Island! Ride the Cyclone! POP--Pay One Price!
Mays - Polyester!
Picway Shoes -Back-to-school!
Coca-Cola - Bobby Riggs and Billie Jean King lookalikes battle it out over Pong in the arcade.
Treetots
Charmin - Mr. Whipple, natch.
St. John’s College - Ah, campus life in the 70's. Groovy.
Woolworth & Woolco
ABC Bod Squad: Quickfast - A glass of milk, toast with a slice of cheese and out the door to school you go. Is mom on a bender again?
Annie - The Broadway show.
Stick-ups - It may be a good place for a Stick-up, but why is that guy in a closet?
Richway
Magnavision
Jiffy Pop - Before everyone had a microwave, it was this crap or buy a popper.
WPIX cards
Day Line cruise
American Furniture Warehouse 1978
Sunkist soda - Good Vibrations!
Pizza Planet
Clearasil - With Wolfman Jack--none other, little brother!
Jack La Lanne
Alka Seltzer - Plop plop fizz fizz. (Sammy Davis Jr.)
ABC Sunday Movie opening
Burger King
WLS & Disney
New York Air
Sprite Light
Organ Power Pizza - Discolicious, with folks line-dancing to The Hustle played on a big pipe organ.
Pepsi - Intro of 2 liter bottles--refillable! It's a rip of Welcome Back Kotter with Paul Kreppel (It's a Living's oily lounge singer) as the teacher.
Jordache Wild West
“Pick-Up Summer” movie trailer - It makes you want to head to a drive-in immediately!
Lung Association
Minolta (Doug Henning)
Maybelline - Discoliciousity!
Kodak (Michael Landon)
McDonald’s - "Friends" 45 single benefits, I think, Muscular Dystrophy. With MD poster child Rocky Arizzi.
Woolworth Halloween - Six Million Dollar Man, Bionic Woman, Holly Hobbie costumes.
GWG Cords - Super-discolicious! "Hey man, how do you get down so well?" "These GWG cords really let you do it!"
K-Tel Music Machine - Robby the Robot gets down!
Aviance - Yet another Aviance night.
Playtown
Steve’s Pier 1 - A restaurant with that great dark-wooded 70's ambiance.
Clam Broth House
Circle Line - With the World Trade Center in the hazy background.
Oscar Mayer - My bologna has a first name...
Band-Aids - I am stuck on Band-Aids...
Budweiser - Featuring the Taste Buds, that nutty tribute to the wonderful combination of pot and beer. How did they get away with this?
WKTU - Discoliciousness!
9 Lives - Morris the cat.
Tabu
Jack Lalanne
WPLJ 1978
Texas Instruments - Digital watches the size of your head. 1978
Simon
YMCA (John Havlicek)
Kraco car stereo
Tab
ABC News - "The Seventies: American Dream, American Nightmare." 1979
CBS Newsbreak 1979
Preparation H
RC Cola - Me and my RC...
Kentucky Fried Chicken - The Colonel himself makes an appearance. 1978
Apple Jacks - A is for apples, J is for jacks, cinnamon toasty Apple Jacks...
Rice Krispies
Star Kist - Charlie the tuna.
Maidenform Bra
Swanson TV Dinners
ABC 1976 Olympics
ABC Wide World of Sports
ABC Hardy Boys promo
Pepto Bismol - Indi... (urp) ...gestion.
ABC All My Children promo - Has the classic soap opera move: Woman (Susan Lucci) goes to strike man, he grabs her arm, pulls her in for long, sloppy, passionate kiss. It looked ridiculous then too.
Agree - Stops the greasies!
ABC Wide World of Sports - 2nd version.
White Castle - The Serendipity Singers, whoever the the hell they are. 1979
Hostess - I think a bit of the beginning is cut off, but I couldn't resist adding this for Captain Cupcake and Fruit Pie the Magician.
Better Business Bureau - An Abominable Snowman puppet advises you to spend your money wisely.
Sweet Pickles Books - Courtesy of Weekly Reader Books, animals with personality disorders teach kids how not to behave.
$100,000 Bar - Chewy, chewy "carmel" (to the tune, more or less, of Sugar Sugar). 1979
Pop Rocks - The cracklin's what's happenin', the sizzle makes you giggle... (Ricky Paull Goldin)
Underoos
Wisk - You've got ring around the collar, you poor chump.
Clairol Herbal Essence Shampoo - You're gonna swear you've got more hair.
Calgon - Take me away!
Garanimals
Memorex (Ella Fitzgerald)
Popeil Pocket Fisherman - Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach him to fish, he'll eat for a lifetime. Sell him a glove compartment-sized rod for twenty bucks, he'll fish for an hour until it breaks.
Bain De Soleil - For the St. Tropez tan.
Sonic Drive-In 1977
Life Cereal - Even that pug-nosed snob Mikey likes it.
Energy PSA - The one with urgent music, showing planet Earth with a gas gauge heading for empty. It's scary as hell, and it was RIGHT!
Henry Ford Museum and Greenfield Village - Time was, people made their own candles, hooked their own rugs, and, apparently, went to Dearborn Michigan on vacation so they could make their own candles and hook their own rugs.
Eastern & Disney 1978
Contour Girdles
K-Tel Pure Gold LP - Announcer misses cue at end.
Pop Tarts - Milton the Toaster.
Record World - Shaun Cassidy LP's.
Look of Love LP
Hawaiian Punch - Punchy, that obnoxious, violent creep.
Burger King - Star Wars glasses, 1978
McDonald’s - The stock grand opening ad, showing the old blue uniforms. 1972
Star Trek Command Communication Console 1976
ABC Brady Bunch - Mid-seventies promo.
ABC Sixth Sense - Creepy promo for short-lived Gary Collins series.
ABC Monday Night Football - Jazzy!
Energized Spiderman figure
Hardy Boys dolls
Honda Scooter
Tootsie Pop - Mr. Turtle and Wise Old Owl offer no help whatsoever in ascertaining the number of licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop. Modern science will later determine the answer as 411.
CBS In The News intro- Okay, it's one from the eighties, but it has the same voiceover guy and that great computery theme which effectively announced, "Okay, cartoons are over--get your ass off the floor, put your cereal bowl in the sink and go outside and get some fresh air fer crying out loud!"
ABC Time For Timer “You are what you eat”
ABC Schoolhouse Rock intro and outro
Keep America Beautiful PSA 1971
Humane Society PSA
Forest Service PSA
Korvette’s
Burger King
WOR Bowling for Dollars promo - NYC, Larry Kenney
Dairy PSA
Buscemi’s Pizza - All-time classic from Detroit... Dumb ad, but suddenly you see a local anchorwoman superimposed over the screen, picking her teeth! No doubt it was some director doing it as a goof, but then the anchorwoman looks to the side, presumably at a monitor, and the image disappears! I bet heads rolled for that one...
Ritz Thrift Shop - Played in NYC forever.
Cross at the Green PSA
Empty Buildings PSA
Downstairs Up Record Shop
ABC Partridge Family - Jeez, Danny Bonaduce was never funny.
Burger King
Chams Du Baron
Albert Merrill School
WPIX
Trix - Trix rabbit does his Fonzie impression.
Burger King (Patrick Swayze)
McDonald’s
ABC Time For Timer “Wagon Wheels” - I hanker fer a hunka cheese!
posted by psaur @ 7:49 PM
