CHRISTMAS & TOY COMMERCIALS of the 70's and 80's!
United States Postal Service - Robert Klein, Milton Berle, Rose Marie, Willie Mays, Bobby Riggs and Lynn Redgrave behoove you to mail your cards early.
Toys R Us - "Fireplaces glowing, icicles growing, hearts overflowing with cheer, it's that wonderful season we all find so pleasing, the Toys R Us time of year! The world's greatest toy store is Toy's R Us, the biggest selection, Toys R Us... It's the Toys R Us time of year!" Geoffrey, Gigi and kids cruise around in a convertible while it's snowing (hey, they're giraffes) in this great animated spot. (1976)
Ronco Mr. Microphone - The original, including "Hey, good looking, we'll be back to pick you up later!" The guy boogie-ing down the street singing "Jingle Bells" is worth the price of admission right there.
Crazy Eddie- New York City local ad. Features Jerry Carroll and stoned CE employees.
WCBS - Michelle Marsh, Ed Koch, Peter Allen & Noo Yawkas wish you Merry Christmas!
R.B Rice Sausage - Animated spot with anthropomorphic animals breaking bread.
"Casper's First Christmas" will return card
Woolworth and Woolco - The Tyco Z-28 racing set.
Toys R Us - Arte Johnson, with bad French accent, hawks the Fresh n' Fancy cosmetic kit. (1980)
Ace Hardware - Suzanne Somers helps Santa out, singing "Ace is the place with the helpful hardware man." (The last word was later changed to 'folks' for political correctness' sake.) (1982)
Mays - Mattel Electronic Football and other electronic games.
Underoos - Kids get Spiderman, Hulk, Batman and Batgirl Underoos for Christmas.
Radio Shack - Electronic games.
Dial-a-Santa - That would be 976-3636 in the NY area. With little Peter Billingsley, years before his turn as Ralphie in "A Christmas Story."
Korvettes - Farrah Fawcett-Majors Glamor Center styling head, Wonder Woman Doll.
Burger King - What kid didn't want a stuffed cloth Burger King doll?
Macy’s - The Thanksgiving Day parade and the start of Christmas sales.
Coca-Cola - "I'd like to buy the world a home, furnish it with love, grow apple trees, honeybees and snow-white turtle doves. I'd like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony, I'd like to buy the world a Coke and keep it company..." Multi-ethnic young people holding candles sit on a hillside in the shape of a Christmas tree. Warm n' fuzzy. Or nauseating--your call. "From your bottler of Coca-Cola."
Mays - Selling Mountain King Christmas trees, plus "lovely nightgowns" and "luxurious robes" for mom.
Ronco Record Vac - See Ron Popeil himself in a cableknit sweater clean his Mantovani with this device, and a young blonde chickie shake her moneymaker to "The Entertainer." Has the familiar "Deck the Halls" tune at the end, hence its inclusion. Announcer asks, "Does dirt and static electricity make your records sound like this?" I answer, "Yes they does."
Ronco Potato Chip Maker - If you like your chips thin, greasy and dark brown, this is evidently for you. ("Deck the Halls" again...) "Also a fancy food cutter!"
Byrne Dairy - Cute local (regional?) ad using Fisher-Price Little People in stop-motion animation.
Macy’s - After-Christmas sale. (1983)
Pepsi - Pre-Cosby Show Keshia Knight Pulliam cutes it up with other kiddies making decorations.
Wendy’s - Watch the mother try not to barf as she bites into a Wendy's burger.
Pepsi - Disney toys offer. (1979)
Radio Shack - Ike Eisenman plays pong.
Hershey’s Kisses - "Inside this little Hershey's kiss..." (1979)
Mattel Electronics - Otis the drunk (that is, actor Hal Smith) dresses as Santa in a football helmet to hawk those old-school Mattel handheld games. (1980)
JC Penney - Sweaters, shirts and a seriously cheap set.
Ceaser’s Bay - Brooklyn flea market. This commercial looks like it could have been shot anytime between 1980 and now.
Michelob - "Holidays were made for Michelob, holidays were made for special friends." John Forsythe and Barbara Babcock host pals at a sophisticated, beery holiday gathering.
Korvettes - Christmas countdown, with Mego's Wonder Woman Collapsing Tower set.
Mays - Toy sale.
Crazy Eddie - Jerry Carroll in rare calm repose.
Alexander’s - "For Christmas shopping... I browse through Bloomingdale's, I tip-toe through Tiffany's, but I buy at Alexander's, I buy gifts at Alexander's... I'm sauntering through Saks, meandering through Macy's..." There's another version later on the tape.
Hill’s - The best thing about this one for Hill's toys is at the very beginning... The camera pans over toy aisles and there's a Shogun Warriors endcap! Brief, but cool!
Two Guys - Preschool toys.
TSS - Christmas sale on Dancerella and Coleco Telstar Galaxy.
Skaggs - In an old Looney Tunes clip, Yosemite Sam yells "What's all the fuss about, Skaggs?" "It's the sounds of Christmas '78, Sam!" says the voiceover, then we get a sequence of toys being noisily played. Skaggs is a chain of drugstores, so the toys are plenty lame. (1978)
McDonald’s - Great winter-themed ad with many memorable images--foosball, kid pretending to eat french fry through McDonald's window, employees in blue uniforms, and that big white bag.
Genovese - William B. Williams dressed as Santa.
Crazy Eddie - Microwave ovens for Christmas. "Chicken not included." (1983)
United - Animated spot.
Ronco Mr. Microphone - A later 80's version. Forward-thinking Ron Popeil added a brief bit showing that it works in Spanish too!
Pebbles cereal - Fred and Barney somehow celebrate Christmas. (1981)
NBC - Stars of Little House: A New Beginning, CHiPs, Voyagers (Jon Erik Hexum and Meeno Peluce), Love Sidney, Fame, Diff'rent Strokes, Facts of Life, Father Murphy, Gimme a Break, Silver Spoons and Real People (plus Sue Simmons and Jack Cafferty from NYC"s Live at 5) wish you happy holidays.
Union 76 - Character actor Richard X. Slattery (trust me, you'd know him if you saw him) in a nice, wordless Christmas interlude.
Andre champagne - Ting!
KPIX - San Francisco station bumpers.
CBS "special" intro - You know, that short bit that heralded showings of Rudolph and Charlie Brown, with spinning, colorful letters and dramatic percussion and horns... it still sends a chill down my spine!
Barbie Dream House - Long ad with Benson's Missy Gold. Believe it or not, the song heard is "Barbie Girl," but this one is to the tune of "Georgy girl."
WOR - A bunch of forlorn-looking New York City kids stand around in fake snow while "Sleigh Ride" plays.
Singer - Thoughtful hubby gets wife the sewing machine of her dreams. (1977)
ABC John Denver special
ABC “The Nativity” (1978)
Zany Zappers - "Zany Zappers... You can flash someone you know!"
Slinky - The train, the kitten, the cat-a-puller, and some awesone orange shag.(1977)
Star Wars Early Bird Kit - The Holy Grail of 70's toy commercials as far as I'm concerned. There were no toys ready for Christmas when the movie exploded, so you would just get this certificate that you sent in and you'd get the Luke, Leia, Artoo and Chewbacca figures in the mail sometime in early 1978, like I did. Super cool. (1977)
Chutes Away - Only part of the ad, featuring Dick Van Dyke.
Socker Boppers and Silly Sword - Kids are shown thumping their Socker Boppers (giant inflatable boxing gloves) into the other kids' Socker Boppers, never making body contact. Yeah right. Likewise, the Silly Sword is not seen in action at all, as you may as well just imagine the bloody melee that results from giving these weapons to kiddies.
Alvin the Aardvark
Donny & Marie Microphones 1977
Weebles - Good Weeble Blimp and Tumblin' Weebles.
Fisher-Price toys - The rolling phone, the hopping frog, etc. (1978)
Atari - Jason Hervey and Ronnie Schell play Breakout.
Two Guys - Toyland, with the Hot Wheels Scorcher Chamber.
Sew Perfect - "Snap in the cassette and sew--Sew Perfect!"
Hungry Hungry Hippos
Boomuzzle - Cheap Perfection rip. (1978)
Starsky & Hutch car (1977)
Spiderman Fluff Flyer - Essentially a Nerf plane with Spiderman stickers on the wings. Has one of those great generic instrumentals under it, very heroic-sounding, even with the wakka-wakka guitar.
Superhero Power Shields - A cardboard shield that shoots propellers. As drugstore toys went, not bad.
Burning Keycars - Meeno Peluce again!
Tender Lovin’ Kisses
Playworld - Ground Control game, animated ending with familiar jingle: "Playworld, a world of toys, great for girls and great for boys, Playworld, where prices go... so low, low, low, low... loooooooow. Playworld!"
Show n’ Tell Viewer
Mr. T doll - "Mr. T! He's got legs that move, he's twelve inches hi-igh! Mr. T! He's got a real cool haircut and a mean, mean look in his eye! He's got arms that move and fists full of rings, you can pretend that Mr. T is real tough and mean--Mr. T! Mr. T!" The excitement of the song is belied by the sight of two boys trying really hard to figure out how to have fun with a Mr. T doll. Mostly they punch it or glare at it.
Fairchild Video Games
Bat-Away - Mel Allen v.o.
Super Puff Basketball
Fluid Fantasy - From Wham-o, it's "the adult's toy." I'm not sure what that means, but I had it as a kid and it was cool as hell. Stoners would probably dig it too.
Tweety & Sylvester bank
Princess Make-up - See twelve-year-olds makin' time at the roller disco!
Q-Bert - Animated. (1983)
Astroblast - "You give missles the muscle!" (1978)
Scree-echers Spiderman Vs. The Fly Race Set - I had this. It ruled. But kinda sucked too. (1977)
Collision Crossing - Tyco racing set with the glow-in-the-dark bridge.
Gorgeous Creatures - Very strange toy. Drag queen dolls with animal heads.
Strawberry Shortcake Garden House
Toys R Us 1981
Viewmaster Showbeam Projector
Sound FX Machine
Reggie Jackson Junior Batting Trainer
Charlie’s Angels Van
Barbie Star Traveler Van - With Judy Strangis, best known as Dyna-girl to Dierde Hall's Electra Woman. (1976)
Command Drive Dirt Bike - I had it. It ruled.
Flying Aces - (1975)
SSP Smash-Up Derby
Darth Vader case
Puffi Fuzzi Shrinky Dinks
Dukes of Hazzard Finger Racers
Odyssey 2 KC Munchkin - Pac-Man rip-off, subject of well-deserved litigation, and lots of fun.
See n’ Drive - (1978)
Hulk Rage Cage - Inflate a rubber Hulk until it breaks out of cage. Repeat as desired.
Play Doh Dr. Drill n’ Fill
Beware the Spider
Battlestar Galactica Cylon Bubbler - (1978)
Slime Monster Game - I had it. It ruled. (1977)
Cabbage Patch Dolls
Mighty Men & Monster Maker
Smurf Crazy Foam
Radio Controlled Hulk
Brush-A-Tune - Hilariously cheap ad for a musical toothbrush which tinkles out a verse of "Talk to the Animals" over and over.
Mr. Potato Head - (1983)
Betty Crocker Shake Machine - (1981)
A Bad Case of Worms - Best toy name ever. (1981)
Toy’s R Us
Alligator game - Scott Schwartz.
Fisher-Price Movie Viewer - (1973)
Magic Show Kit
He-Man Point Dread Talon Fighter
Lemon Twist - Incredibly bad song.
Tuneyville Choo-Choo - Sterling Holloway v.o.
Glow-in-the-Dark Shrinky Dinks
Hook Line & Stinker
Slinky - Different from the other one on here--this one with lime-green shag carpeting! (1977)
Wonder Woman Dolls (1977)
Pink & Pretty Barbie (1981)
Jordache doll (1981)
ET Atari (1982)
Cosmic Ark (1982)
Empire Strikes Back figures - Zuckuss.
Hot Wheels (1982)
Belt Racers - This commercial is just plain odd. Two boys meet on the sidewalk, silently look at each other with big grins, then yank off their belts. The mailman looks on, horrified.
Lip Gloss Lockets (1981)
Fisher-Price Workbench (1981)
Glamour Us (1981)
Irwin Sings Sesame Street LP
Eyewitness News Game
Tuff Stuff Basket (1981)
Dizzy Dolphin Disco
Baby Ann set
Talking Garfield the cat doll - (1983)
Gimme 5 (1981)
Tobor - "Tobor is robot spelled backward." DFB.
Weeble Tub Sub
Lite Brite - With G.I Joe and Strawberry Shortcake. (1982)
Nintendo Pocket Pinball
Nintendo Spitball Sparky
Charlie’s Angels dolls
Gloworm, Glo Bug, Glo Baby
Bionic Woman dolls
Slime It’s Alive - That would be the truly disgusting slime containing eyeballs.(1978)
Operation - The original.
Big Wheel Champion - Has jingle to the tune of "We Are the Champions"!
My Little Pony
Hot Wheels (1979)
Chutes Away - Night Rescue.
Fisher-Price Marching Band
Invader From Space
Up Down Change Around Roller Coaster
AFX Lazer 2000
Strawberry Shortcake Berry Busy Bug - From the SS Miniatures line. (1982)
Bank Shot (1980)
White Plains Galleria
Fred Meyer - Long segment from KOIN "commercial-free" 1981 or 1982 showing of "Miracle on 34th Street."
Cher gives holidays wishes (Solid Gold Christmas Special, 1982)
Sheena Easton (SGCS)
Barry Manilow (SGCS)
Lionel Richie (SGCS)
Eddie Rabbit (SGCS)